Time to Make Puddles Collide

The picture above was taken during a prayer walk in Tyler this past weekend. A group of people are coming together in unity to pray for our community. (Notice "community" has the word "unity in it, btw.)

Unity: the state or fact of being united or combined into one as of the parts of a whole unification.

"Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity!" -Psalm 133:1

"...walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as also you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all who is over all and through all in all." -Ephesians 4:1-6

There is such a separation in our cities today. People remove themselves from living anywhere near those who are different; whether they are of lower income, different race or of different beliefs. Isn't it ironic that we have moved away, totally separated ourselves, from the very thing we were commanded to go to; the very people we were told to love and care for.

The world doesn't need more people with more money to help those who don't have much; the world needs people with more heart. People who don't mind getting dirty, don't mind having to seek out those who need help, people who think more of others instead of "what people will think about them."

"You shall not hate your fellow countryman in your heart; you may surely reprove your neighbor, but shall not incur sin because of him. You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself; I am the LORD." -Leviticus 19:17-18

Whether we want to admit it or not, we group certain races with bad things that have happened in our country, or sometimes even in our own lives.
We consciously choose not to help certain people or withhold God's love to them simply because of their origin or the color of their skin. We may say we disapprove of racism, but we ourselves do it in our own minds.

"Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all transgressions." -Proverbs 10:12

Now, I'm not saying we all hate these people we have chosen to live a distance from, but if we aren't showing them love...we're showing them the opposite of love, and that is just as wrong. It causes problems, not only in our world, but in our hearts as well. When we make the choice to follow Christ, His love dwells in us! It is so much love that it has to overflow from our lives, but often times we press it down, holding it all inside so we don't have to share...but because we are keeping it from it's very purpose, it causes problems in our hearts, our families and our lives. It's time to give it away.

"-Blessed are the gentle, for they shall inherit the earth.
-Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
-Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
-Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
-Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely
say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for
your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted
the prophets who were before you.
-Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your
good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.
-You have heard that the ancients were told, 'YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT MURDER'
and 'Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.' But I say to you that
everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever
says to his brother, 'You good-for-nothing,' shall be guilty before the supreme court;
and whoever says 'You fool,' shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell." -Matthew 5: 5, 7-9, 11-12, 16, 21

Gentle, merciful, pure in heart, peacemakers, those who rejoice in times of trouble, those who shine Jesus, those who do not let anger take over their heart, those who do not mock or accuse their brother....those are blessed.
Those are the ones who let God have control of their heart instead of pushing Him away from it.

"By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." -John 13:35

"This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you." -John 15:12

LOVE ONE ANOTHER. It's said over and over in the bible, but how often do we not apply it to our own lives and tell other people how they should be loving US? We are a selfish people. We want everything having to give up nothing. We were born this way, and will die this way. The more I see "me" being stamped on my life, the more I long for heaven where I will be able to do nothing but praise God and please Him. I can do so on this earth, but I also have a choice to do wrong, as well. Every day, every hour, every single minute I have to make the choice to
love. Love isn't something you just feel, it's something you MUST do. You have to live out love for it to be affective.

"If I speak with the tongues of men and angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophesy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing. Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not bran and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek it's own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails, but if there are gifts of prophesy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease, if there is knowledge, it will be done away." -1 Corinthians 13:1-8

This has got to be one of the most amazing verses in the bible...at least I think so. Every time I try to live my life the way I want, I notice how unhappy I am. Living for oneself is no fun; seriously. You become angry, mean, unloving and unkind. It's an awful place to be. If we are living our love, we will be able to do all of these things in this verse!

"But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith." -1 Timothy 1:5

Our GOAL: love from a pure heart, good conscience and sincere faith. Sounds simple, right? I find it slightly funny that the things in life that seem so incredibly simple are the hardest, most pain staking things we must try to do.
-A Pure Heart: one that is not contaminated with dirt from the world and myself. One that is truly in it's purest form. Almost organic; nothing but the fresh fruit of God.
-Good Conscience: when you do wrong, it stays in your mind. It comes back to haunt you; it makes your life miserable because your mistake stay there every day, keeping you from fully living. You're a tree in November; you're still alive, but on the outside you look dead, lifeless. "When Jesus spoke again to the people, He said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows Me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." " -John 8:12
-Sincere Faith: This is the big "religion or relationship" thing I always talk about. You can't just say you have faith, you have to actively HAVE it.
Anyone can say they have faith in a friend that they will catch them if they fall backwards, but until they actually fall, they do not sincerely have faith in that friend.

"Let love of the brethren continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it." -Hebrews 13:1-2

How often do we make hospitality all about us? We make a choice to invite someone over for dinner or whatever the reason, but the minute someone desires hospitality or truly needs it, it's inconvenient for us. We are to treat strangers with such love and hospitality as if we were entertaining Jesus.

"The end of all things is near; therefore, be of sound judgment and sober spirit for the purpose of prayer. Above all,
keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins." -1 Peter 4:8

The last part of this verse is mind boggling. The perfect example is God giving His life for OUR sins. His LOVE covered the sins we have committed, have just committed and will in the future. It covers everything. He paid it all.

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loves us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in is, and His love is perfected in us." -1 John 4:7-11

It is not easy to love, I will be the first to admit. Especially when someone hasn't been super easy to deal with or has purposefully hurt me. That's when I want to quote the "eye for an eye and tooth for a tooth" verse. They hurt me, I'll hurt them back. It's only fair; right? Wrong.
As my mom, and I'm sure many other parents have said, "Life isn't fair." It's so true. It it were "fair" God wouldn't have died for us. The bible says,
very clearly, that if we do not love we do not know God. God is love, but He is also just. If we claim to know God, call Him our own, we had better make sure we're showing fruit of that relationship. God does not appreciate His name on something that is not His.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. We love, because He first loved us. If someone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also." -1 John 4:18-21

We cannot say we love God then turn around and toss our brothers or sisters in the trash. We cannot go around talking negatively about others, we cannot be rude, inconsiderate or hurtful to people and love God at the same time. Mind you, God will forgive all our sins, but wouldn't it be better to make the right choice instead of dealing with the ache we get from knowing we disappointed God?

The day we realize people around us deserve love just as much as we do is the day the world, just might, start to change. The day we decide to go talk to that neighbor, or right a wrong, apologize for being less than love, caring for those in need, giving away instead of hording to oneself.

To make a difference, it all starts with you. Battles are not won by numbers, but by faith. One person going out and loving can explode into thousands of people's lives being touched. Take a glass of water and pour three small, separate, puddles on the floor. Watch as they spread and finally reach each other and form one larger puddle then as it spreads even faster as it gets bigger. There are many groups around our country that are trying to spread so much so that it unites with other
revolutionaries. Let's start making puddles!

Romans 12:9-12

Not My Will But Thine

God died for me. For ME. The very one who might as well have cried "CRUCIFY HIM!" the one who hammered the nails into His hands and feet on the cross.

You know what brings me to my knees? The fact that, though I put Him on the cross, He actually went willingly. He knew it was going to happen and didn't run away; when He was on the cross, He didn't call the angels down to take Him down or carry Him away. He suffered great agony just to save my life. That is true love.

Who else has ever done that? Nobody.

So many days I rush through my schedule, thinking of all *I* need to get done for *me* and *my* life. I forget God is there and that I need nothing else, because He is sufficient for my every need. Don't get me wrong, this doesn't mean I don't need to do my regular daily tasks, but more that I need to do them with intent. I need to do my jobs diligently as if I were doing them for the very King I bow down before.

I have so much in my head right now, I thought for sure I'd be able to "put it down on paper" so to speak. At this very moment though, I am almost without words. Yes, the girl who writes until her fingers won't move anymore.

I watched Courageous again last night with my dad and was again reminded of how sad a shape this world is in. Husbands and fathers who are willing to stand up for what is right, willing to be the leader and protector of their families; Single men who actually know how to stand up on their own and be a real man; Single young women who have more than a 2 week relationship on their mind; Women who follow their husbands lead without complaint or grief; Children who actually know what the word "respect" means; these are all a dying breed. Selfishness is tearing apart our world; it has since the beginning of time. How many times do we point our finger in God's face and tell Him we know what's best...only to mess everything up? How often do we put our hope in something or someone other than God only to end up disappointed?

"My hope is in the Lord." It should be simple, but so often I forget the only hope I have in this life is Jesus Christ.

While it is hard for the outside world to take it in or comprehend it, God is truly all we need. He is so gracious to let us make our choices, but still wait for us when we realize we've made the wrong ones.

Mistakes haunt every day I go through. Memories plague my mind and cause me to have thoughts of regret and despair. Through it all, God is there. He stands tall and true, allowing me the time I need to come back to Him and again trust His guidance. He is the light, and without light, my path is nothing but darkness. No walk I go on will have a lit path unless I allow Him to lead me.

"Choose for yourselves whom you will serve: ....as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." -Joshua 24:15

We have the choice. Nobody has forced us to choose or deny God. I made the choice to serve God a long time ago, and though there are some really rough times, God has never left me, He has never kept His love from me. It is still impossible for me to comprehend or grasp how He could love me so much after what I caused Him to go through 2,000 years ago on that cross, and still to this day when I stray from Him for a time. The hurt a father feels when his child doesn't listen to his guidance and then gets hurt...the pain he feels in his heart; the aching he has in his soul. Every time I disobey or turn from my holy Father's wisdom, it hurts Him. He wants what's best for me, but I still often choose the wrong way.

"I see the king of glory, coming on the clouds with fire. The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes. I see his love and mercy, washing over all our sin. The people sing, the people sing.

Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest. Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.

I see a generation, rising up to take their place. With selfless faith, with selfless faith. I see a near revival, stirring as we pray and seek. We're on our knees, we're on our knees.

Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest. Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.

Heal my heart and make it clean, open up my eyes to the things unseen. Show me how to love like You have loved me. Break my heart from what breaks Yours, everything I am for Your kingdoms cause as I go from nothing to eternity." -(Hosanna, by Hillsong Chapel)

Isn't it time we go to our knees? Isn't it time we receive new hearts by having ours broken for the things that breaks His?

Though we have been given the free will to choose how we live out our life, as followers of Christ we will be judged for every decision we make. If we make the wrong ones, it's on us.

When I get to heaven one day, I want to hear "Well done my good and faithful servant." I want more of HIM and less of ME. But to do that, I have to humble myself before God...and that is not easy.

My prayer is that the longer I live, the closer I get to my God. The more like Him I become so eventually you won't even be able to see me; only a person filled with God's love.

Every Good and Perfect Thing

"There is none righteous, not even one; there is none who understands, there is none who seeks for God; all have turned aside, together they have become useless; there is none who does good, there is not even one." Romans 3:10-12

The day I realize I cannot be perfect or good is the day I will be be home with Jesus. Even though, at times, I admit that I cannot do anything good outside of Christ, I still have days where I try to be "good" in and of myself.

The only way one can be made perfect is through Jesus Christ; through His sacrifice.

The dreams and plans I have for my life are selfish and unworthy to be lived. None of them will ever be fulfilling because they're all about ME.

My prayer is that I will stop trying to figure out what I want out of life, and start asking HIM what HE wants for me.

"Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights," James 1:17

Love.

Love.

I speak of it as if I know what it truly means.

Love.

I say I act it, though I trample over it when hard times come.

Love.

I give what I think is love so easily, and take it back just as quick.

Love.

What do I really know about it? That I am loved by the One True God? Or that some Infinite Being I can't even see told a bunch of His friends to write down in a book about all the ways He loves me? But I don't see why I need it, do I? I see myself as better than the next person, right?

Love.

The emotion, feeling and gift to be able to give everything away for the one person you care for. Maybe, to give your life away for a friend. The ultimate gift of love.

It's easy for me to receive love. "Just drink it in, Jessie. You always say you've had a rough life." It's cruel letting Satan get so much in my head that I actually begin to feel sorry for myself, that I can actually forget all about love because I'm rolling in my own self-pity.

How many times,exactly, will I give up on love? Not just receiving it, that's the easy part, but giving it away so freely that I'm like a machine who has not been programed for stopping. Love should be a movement that never ends! I have the Father of all there is inside my heart. It should be glowing, beaming, shining forth with love, whether I think the people around me deserve it or not.

How often have I snatched up my love from another person because they have teased me, mocked me, told lies about me or condemned me with their words? I give up. I say "no more. I will not keep trying to give love to someone so unlovable. How many times do I have to show love to them, only to have them put a hand up in my face to silence me?"

Jesus.

He loves all. He gave for all.

All.

Everyone in the world. Every human on the face of this earth.

I am unlovable. Yet, God has loved me since before I was born; since the beginning of time. He knew He would have to give His life to prove His love, giving it as a willing sacrifice. For who? The very one who put Him on the cross to die. Me.

Me.

A sinful, dirty, weak, hateful creature. If it were all up to me, I wouldn't love anyone. My heart is deceitful. It doesn't want to give anything away. The heart I was born with is filthy and selfish.

Love.

The miracle of all miracles. Through Christ, my heart and my entire life has been made new! He not only loved me, but He transformed my life into something beautiful. But it is not me. *I* am not beautiful. Any beauty anyone sees is all Jesus. Often times Satan is able to get to my ears; he whispers lies of despair, blame, regret and depression and people will see a lot less HIM and a lot more ME. To keep from holding back love, I have to constantly look to the Lord; I have to make sure I never turn my eyes from Him. This is quite easily said; doing it is a whole other story. Lies can overpower the truth often times, and in those times it is even more important that I keep my eyes on Jesus. Satan will use every bad day, every negative thought or depressing mood to throw it back in my face and tell me how hopeless I am. At that point, I simply have to trust that when Jesus died, He truly died for ME, however ugly I might seem.

I have this one thought that has come to mind a lot throughout my life. If I were to find out I had a deadly disease, like unbeatable cancer, would I live my life any differently? Would I love more and criticize less; would I go for things without thinking about how scared I was; would I go to those who have hurt me and say "I forgive you" even though it has not been asked?

What would you do differently?

We have one life to live here on this earth. What are we doing to make the most of it?


John 3:16
For God (the greatest giver) so loved (the greatest motive) the world (the greatest need) that He have (the greatest act) His only begotten Son (the greatest gift) that whoever (the greatest invitation) believes in Him (the greatest foundation) should not perish (the greatest salvation) but have (the greatest assurance) everlasting life (the greatest possession.)

It's simple. God is love. Love should rule our lives, hearts, actions, thoughts and deeds. Nothing less will do.

Am I Really Living My Life?

I've got a few more verses than normal, but just stick with me for a minute.

"But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also; and whoever takes away your coat, do not withhold your shirt from him either. Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back. Treat others the same way you want them to treat you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned. Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure--pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return." -Luke 6:27-38

It was quite interesting looking through these verses and others similar to it. I love the bible verses that tell what our responses SHOULD be in certain circumstances.
We can make excuses and pull our versions of specific parts of the bible for whatever we want to use them for but sometimes there's no way to misinterpret/misuse them.
(For me, having something that is simply laid out before me is much easier on my brain.)
These kinds of texts are those that can't be used for our own personal use; they cannot be used to justify our actions. Unless our actions are based on love, we're in the wrong. End of story.

These are the kinds of verses that can't be used in the "Well he/she started it when he/she was unkind and unloving first. It's their fault and it says right here that my actions were totally okay." No, no. Sometimes this quote just sounds like a broken record by my own mouth/heart and others I hear using it, as well. These verses are plain and clear. Right to the point.

We are to love even if we're not loved in return. We are to give all that we are asked of with no expectations of getting anything back.

The past few months I've noticed I haven't been very loving... at all. I've been pretty snappy and rude to my family. I got to the point where everything I did caused me to have memories, good and bad, and I decided it was time to cut everyone and everything off; cut everything I loved from my life so I could find peace. Part if that has helped me, because I've been spending a lot of time with God, but whereas that relationship has had deep, tearful, and heartfelt moments...I snap out of it and return to my heartless actions to the rest of the people I'm around.
It's made me very sad realizing how much I've become irritable, impatient and grumpy. I've always told myself I would watch my actions so I wouldn't end up like that but the more I tried to keep from turning into that, I've done just the opposite...just as I've told people countless times. I pushed so hard that I became the very thing I hated.

My outward love for those close in my life started fading away. I've been noticing it more and more. It's like the pain I've been feeling has just turned my heart off to having any kind of feelings. Because we all know...no feeling is better than a bad feeling, right? This is one thing I'm trying very hard to turn back around. There are day when I just want to lay around the house all day; do nothing and feel nothing. I don't want to see anyone, talk to anyone, do anything and just roll in my self pity. Sounds like a ball, I know.

Let me tell you something; pushing away problems, hurts and scars doesn't make them any less painful. When you act like nothing is wrong, it only eats you more inside. Dealing with problems, the right way, is to work through them...not hide them from everyone who cares.

As I sat in church on the New Year reading through Isaiah 44, it talked a great deal about idols. I've always known an idol didn't have to be a carved image or a statue of Buddha. It is anything that is valued above God. I sat thinking to myself.
Well, when I become unloving, unkind, easily offended or irritated...that is the opposite of love; we are told to live like Christ; Christ is God Himself; the bible says, "God is love"; so when I don't love, I am not acting Christ-like, therefore I'm putting something above God. All of the sudden, my negative actions have become like an idol to me. I no longer allow God to work in my heart and mind; I no longer heed His voice but push it aside so I can try and bury my feelings.
Okay, so it may not seem like an idol to you guys, but how much time I spend listening to the pain and hurt instead of God's Healing voice...that's putting THEM above HIM.

Life is rough, it's just that simple, and I've learned that. Growing up I only had a few things happen that affected me in a huge negative way (non of which had to do with my family) and every time, I have drawn back into a hole and pushed everyone out. Part of growing up is realizing how my actions SHOULD be in these kinds of situations. Learn from mistakes and failures and move on.
Claim God's grace and mercy and just move on. Get on with my life because, in reality, if I'm still breathing God still has work for me.

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 says, "There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven-- A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to search and a time to give up as lost; a time to keep and a time to throw away, A time to tear apart and a time to sew together; a time to be silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate (Proverbs 8: 13); a time for war and a time for peace." (this wasn't every verse)

Sometimes it's difficult to understand why things happen the way they do. It's easy to excuse our drifting from God and blame Him for not showing His plans to us.
It is so easy to place the blame on someone we cannot see and, in our minds, cannot come up with a come back for our accusations.
It's easier to put our faith in the seen than it is to have faith in the unseen.
It's easy to place someone or something over God when we don't feel His presence there with us.

- - - - Anything we put over God is an idol - - - -
It can be our job, activities or hobbies, family, friends, hurt, material things, thoughts...any of these things can be created into a god in our minds if we let it. WE make them idols when we put them above God.

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven--"

- God has a reason for every single thing that happens.
- God doesn't allow us to be in pain just for the sake of pain; He has a reason for the pain, a *purpose for allowing it in our life.
- God has a reason for loss; if He takes something away it's only because He has something *better planned.
- God has a reason for being silent sometimes. He never leaves us, ever, but rather wants us to *trust Him and be *faithful even when we can't hear Him.

Just because it seems like God isn't speaking doesn't mean He isn't working. "We Shall See Jesus" in every area of our life. Look around you. You see creation, trees and plants giving us food and oxygen. Babies cuddled under the arm of their mom/dad. You see animals and insects....they aren't just "there"; each one has a special assignment for their life, a special task they were made to do. The breath of man himself is proof of God's faithfulness. He could have destroyed us long ago, but His love ruled out over destruction.

Our God is always there.
Our God is ALWAYS faithful.
Our God is always God.